Getting Married (Part 4)

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3

I love a good wedding

All my friends will tell you

I’m the first to cry at them

Be there to sing and dance and by merry

And celebrate the legal uniting of 

Two souls

I’ve been to weddings in gardens

On farms 

In churches

I’ve had the privilege of speaking at weddings

And singing in the ceremony

I love watching friends and family

Declare love

To their loved ones 

And for my own wedding

I wanted exactly no part of the circus

I’ve been engaged once before

We started preparing a wedding

Picked a date, went dress shopping, drafted lists, looked at venues

Learnt that the minute you mentioned

“Wedding” instead of “party”

The prices instantly doubled 

I discovered that 

Every. Person. In. The. World.

Has. An. Opinion.

And if you don’t listen to, and follow through, with their 

Sage advice

You will be DOOMED

Or offend, insult, or have yourself struck from the family tree. 

Instead of perusing wedding magazines

And blogs

Or attending fairs and conventions

Or sitting with girlfriends and sisters over coffee

Discussing details

I read about the history of weddings

Trying to understand 

What bought us to this level of crazy

I discovered that, in its earliest days,

The Christian church abhorred marriage

And declared celibacy was the only way to spiritual truth 

That marriages throughout history

Have been about the economic empowerment of men

And a means of controlling women

Their bodies

And reproduction

Committed by Elizabeth Gilbert

Was the most readable 

The traditions didn’t speak to me 

The white dress, the rings, the vows,

Bows on chairs. 

I hate, with a strange passion, chairs covered with white fabric and bows. 

I just wanted to marry my love

And live happily ever after the end. 

I begged my first fiance to elope 

Save the trouble and expense and drama

Instead we broke up. 

Nearly three years later

I nervously told Aaron

I didn’t actually want a wedding

He was thrilled. 

And so after a very long wait
And most of the year apart
We finally became husband and wife.

We got married on a Monday 

Because it was the first day we could

After applying for the marriage license. 

I wore a dress 

I’ve worn a hundred times 

And will hopefully wear a hundred times more 
Aaron wore a collared shirt 

We both wore smiles. 

We drove to the town hall in Aaron’s car

We walked inside the building

And because we live in Colorado

We did not require witnesses

We did not require a ceremony

Just the intention to be legally bound

We signed our names

Sealed it with a kiss, and, 

We were married.

We called our families
Wrote to our friends
And shared a dinner that we cooked together
It was quiet and lovely
And outside, the snow was glistening. 

The end. 

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3